- Anxiety is a normal response to stressful events such as tests or friend drama.
- Anxiety disorders arise when the anxiety is out-of-proportion to the situation and impairs daily functioning.
- If anxiety impairs functioning, then it is important to recognize and seek treatment. First line treatment is usually Cognitive Behavior Therapy through a trained therapist/counselor.
- Symptoms include overwhelming worry, difficulty tolerating uncertainty, an overactive response to fears and avoidance of situations.
- Some children react with explosive fear and others react by shutting down emotionally.
- Children with anxiety disorders often avoid situations that may trigger anxiety.
What can you do to help?
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- Explain that anxiety is a normal part of life and learning to identify and respond to anxiety thoughts can really be helpful
- Model positive coping skills in your own everyday anxiety-provoking events
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- Remain calm and carry on
- Reframe (change) your own thoughts to recognize that you can work through the anxiety
- Make positive comments such as “I know this is stressful, but I can handle this”
- Avoid negative comments like “I’ll never get through this”
- If you think/say that you cannot handle everyday events, your child will quickly think the same about themselves
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- Help your child identify the anxiety-provoking thoughts he/she may have and show them how to reframe (change) their own thoughts
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- It is okay to validate fears by asking your child what makes them afraid
- For a simple example, if a child is afraid of the dark at bedtime:
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- Turn on the light, look under beds, in closets to show there is nothing to fear
- Turn off the light, lie with your child, point out shadows that are stuffed animals, furniture, etc.
- Turn on the light and point out the items that caused the shadows
- Repeat this process as many times as necessary for the child to gain confidence that the frightening shadows are really not frightening at all
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- You are showing the child that he/she can think through the fear using logic and that he/she is in control of their own thoughts
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- I can be afraid but face the fear and make it go away
- I am not in danger
- I can be strong/brave
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What not to do
- Do not say or think: “He probably won’t hold up if I don’t help him”
- “I have to save her from this awful feeling”
There are many types of anxiety in children and adolescents:
- Separation anxiety: When children are worried about being separated from caregivers
- Social anxiety: When children are excessively self-conscious around others or in groups
- Selective mutism: When children cannot speak in some settings, like at school
- Generalized anxiety: When children worry about a wide variety of everyday things. Kids with generalized anxiety often struggle with perfectionism
- Specific phobias: When children have excessive fear of particular things. This includes arachnophobia, fear of spiders, or school phobia, refusing to go to school
- Panic disorder: When children have sudden, unpredictable panic attacks that may cause feelings of impending death or doom and symptoms of rapid heartbeat, difficulty catching their breath, and sweating
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): When children have unwanted thoughts that feel stuck in their minds and they try to neutralize the thoughts with ritualized behaviors such as touching the light switch 3 times or counting steps
- Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): When children have symptoms after a disturbing event such as difficulty sleeping, nightmares, irritability, and flashbacks or reliving the event
